my peas

i'm seriously neglecting you dear blog. most of my time is spent obsessing over where we'll land in Colorado...but i think i'm making some progress! we'll find out when i head out there later this week with hugh & my sweet mama. hopefully i'll drive into some little neighborhood & have the cottage green (our old neighborhood) just knowing this is it feeling...

i'm also just a very busy mama of 3 sweet lil peas. one of whom (& if i'm lucky it's only one) is always needing something.

not sure why, but this one won't upload correctly...so you'll have to turn your head. and i know it's not a good shot, but it is all 3 of my peas!

iah -> den

For you infrequent travellers out there, that means Houston to Denver. Yep. We are finally making the move out of the Houston area. To Colorado.

What's that? But we just moved you say?

Ah yes. I think that's what I said to my husband when he told me he was ready to go for it.

Since the announcement of the Continental/United merger we've been excited about the possibility of moving to Denver. Colorado is as close to the Holy Grail as it gets for Clay. And since I love the man, I was excited for him that his dream residence was an actual possibility for us. And it's no secret that I'm not in love with the 9 month summer & bugs here.

Then last year we found out baby Hugh was coming...we realized 3 kids plus visitors were going to be a very, very tight squeeze in our little house. It seemed as though the possibility of Denver as a base (like Houston is for us now) was at best a 2-5 year plan. So we found the perfect big house in the bubble and went with it.

Since February there has been talk of Denver opening to Continental pilots (the pilot groups are far from merged)...first it was, then it wasn't, then it was. We discussed it & decided it made the most sense to wait a few years for our house to appreciate, for life to settle down, and for there to be a bit more certainty with the merger.

Then Clay was gone for a week with the Navy & his wonderful mother came down to help me with the kiddos. Clay's dad came down when Clay got back, and I suggested Clay take them both out to breakfast. That was Tuesday, March 6th. He came home from said breakfast ready to move. We talked about it & decided to see if he could get one of the 35 slots open to him in Denver. I didn't think he would be able to.

He was. And just like that we were moving. He got the final news on Friday the 16th. Hugh had his first virus & it had been a rough few nights. I woke up & promptly got a migraine. I was in Hugh's room rocking him...trying to keep him from screaming in my ear...trying to meditate my way out of the migraine when Clay came in. He said, "don't want to interrupt your peace" (as if), "but we got it." I may or may not have burst into tears as soon as he shut the door.

So...here we go again. I'm still processing. 10 days is not a lot of time to get comfortable with basically re-building a life somewhere else. Not to mention selling a house & moving again. This time with 3 kids. One of whom is an infant. Physically & logistically it is going to be awful. I haven't slept through the night in over 4 months. Our house is functioning but far from staged on any given day. It is going to require a tremendous amount of effort.

That said, the biggest challenge I think is going to be the emotional one. I've never been a mama anywhere else. I've barely been married anywhere else. We've never been a family anywhere else. The Lu starts school in August...and I have no idea where. My last few months as the mother of a sweet infant are going to be spent in a moving frenzy instead of in that sweet baby bliss. I'm not sure how to make this okay for the kids when I'm not okay with it all the time.

I'm excited about seasons, snow for Christmas, having a bit of family in the area (my aunt & uncle live north of Denver), a happier hiking husband, and fewer mosquito bites. It's not that I don't want to go, just that the timing is extremely less than ideal for me. The last year has been an *sskicker. And now the next year will be too. That said I'm aware there probably is no ideal time.

Logically there are a few reasons to go now. The move will be paid for now, and wouldn't have been in the future. Interest rates are ridiculously low. And while our house here would appreciate over the next few years, our next house would be most likely be appreciating as well. And it would be nice for Luci to start school in the place where we intend to stay. Which is why I agreed to it despite having 3 kids 4 & under, one of them being my last sweet baby.

A successful marriage requires compromise. We've both made compromises. And as my wise mama reminded me, it's my turn...even if it requires pulling myself up by my bootstraps in order to carry on.

Now if I could just turn off the anxiety regarding the move that wakes up every time Hugh does in the middle of the night maybe I could get a bit more sleep. Staying awake for an hour or more after each of his wakings isn't helping. Nor is the migraine. I'm praying for the faith to know this is what we need. Sure easier to believe He's giving you what you need when it's something you wholeheartedly know you want & are ready for. I just pray that six years from now I've grown to appreciate CO as much as I have TX in these last six...

m'bigboy & his blankie

this is how he soothes himself these days - by smelling his blankie. which i have to admit, usually doesn't have a nice fresh clean scent. he seems to prefer it that way...
he also still has his paci for nap & bed time. he doesn't sleep with it all night, but when he's sick or upset or tired he really wants it. this day he was all three...upset, tired & sick. we've been fighting a bug for a few weeks now. i also suspect his molars are bothering him..he rarely sleeps more than 45 minutes unless i give him tylenol first. so i do. hopefully his teeth will come in soon & we'll be done with teething...he's not done well with any of them!

if i remember correctly, he woke up sobbing 45 minutes into his nap this day only to find dad & luci were out doing something special. without him. he wasn't happy. so i tried to get him to hangout with me on the bed thinking maybe he'd go back to sleep. yeah right!

oh, and he's very into coats with pockets these days. he often wears a coat or hoodie all day, even if it's warm out, just to have a place to put his hands.

two year old temper

did you wonder where gus was in that last set of photos? i had a nice photo of luci & hugh in there after all, so where was gus you ask? here he was, right by the chair.

i asked him to be in the sibling photo. he said no.

with gusto, i might add.

i think i asked again. i probably shouldn't have.

cause then he got quite mad. note the new location of one of his toolboxes.

let's just say it wasn't moved nicely.

hugh @ 3 months...

i think he's winkin atcha in this next one..

my baby boy is 3 months old already. actually like 3 1/2 months by now...but better late than never!

-he's well acquainted with his hands & likes to bring them together. he also likes to eat them. he's just starting to use them to bring toys to his mouth but it is a LOT of work!

-his skinny little neck is finally getting strong enough to hold up that big melon for several minutes at a time

-he's discovered sitting up right, and he'd prefer to not recline anymore, thankyouverymuch

-he's not a snuggler...not even when he's sleepy. he wants to be held so he can watch his big sister & brother, or the fan, or the wall...anything but the dreaded chin on the shoulder hold!

-he went in on tuesday to catch up on some immunizations & weighed in at a whopping 16 lbs 4 oz!

-as you might guess, he likes to eat. 2x each night still! we'll be working on this once i'm certain he's recovered from said immunizations.

-size 2 huggies lil movers, although i'm upping that to size 3 for the next shipment. i think he is also gonna need some special night time diapers if he keeps up this rate of eating...

-size 6m+ clothes...

-he loves his big brother & sister...if he's fussin and g or luci starts to talk to him he usually settles right down

-his social awareness surprises me for his age. he's already more interested in looking & smiling at me or seeing what his siblings are up to than nursing (oh so adorable but annoying at the same time), and is fighting sleep to stay up & hang out.

-he's got stinky lil fists, but he's starting to leave his hands open more so hopefully that sinky lil phase is coming to an end!

-he goes to bed around 7p and is up for the day between 6:30 - 8am usually. he eats between 10p-midnight, then again usually between 3a-6a for another feeding.

-some days he has great consolidated day sleep (one am nap, 2 pm naps), other days he takes 4 naps of 45 minutes or so.

-he's still sleeping in his miracle blanket but can get himself totally out of it if i give him enough time to fuss.

-his sleep routine consists of a diaper change, white noise, a dark room, swaddling, and then usually i rub his belly while humming a song. he usually fusses while i hum with it escalating until i finally leave the room. then he fusses another 5 minutes and is off to sleep. oh, and if i'm home alone with all three kids insert a holler or two...come on guys, it's your brother's turn to sleep...please be kind to each other OR HEY! i said be KIND and be QUIET! DO YOU HEAR MY WORDS!!! just depends on the kind of day we are having. obviously i strive for the former! i pray for a lot of patience & calm...and He's blessed me with ample opportunity to practice said virtues!

-he's a total spitter. like spit up everywhere at least 2x each feeding. burp cloths aren't usually big enough to catch it all...and it is usually projectile. usually in my hair, sometimes in my ear, almost always down my shirt...pretty much everywhere. i go through multiple shirts a day, and rarely mange to wear just one pair of pjs at night. all of this despite the prevacid! fun times!

-all in he's just a joy! this is the most relaxed i've been with an infant, and it is just nice. even with the sleep deprivation!

ps. anyone do a count of the times i used the word usually? ahaha...i guess it is a reflection of my knowledge that with 3 small kiddos at home there aren't very many hard & fast rules!