mood swings...

so last week the kiddos started school. there were a few tears on tuesday from gus. on wednesday the entire family took both cats to the vet...and while walking into petsmart with them tallulah broke out of her busted up kennel (being held together by bungee cords) and took off running in a huge, super busy target/tjmaxx/ross/petsmart parking lot. on thursday gusgus was super sad when i left him at school.

and me? zero emotion. like woman of steel. like not a tear shed at preschool last week. not even with a sobbing gusgus clinging to my leg. after tallulah took off i let out a loud, inappropriate for the audience "sh*t!", but then i was seriously waving my cat of 8+ years good-bye. i mean really. if clay hadn't been there & super fast to react, what was this gigantically pregnant mama with 2 preschoolers in tow with another cat gonna do? run & catch her? i don't think so. i even went so far as to think, "so this is the end, huh. at the parking lot of the vet...where we are attempting to keep her healthy & fulfill our pet owner responsibility."

the kids survived. g was even sent home with a note that had the happy box checked under 'mood'. tallulah survived too. luckily my rockstar super fit, fast, runner husband caught her. in the 105 degree heat, i might add. in a parking lot. he must really love me.

then, all of the sudden today, the weepy me is back. a girl in luci's 4 year old class was near hysterics today when we dropped luci off. she looks a bit like my friends daughter, so i think maybe that is why it got to me. i was nearly in tears walking out of the preschool today. for someone else's child. under circumstances i know nothing about.

and it was a looooonnnngggg afternoon. the kids were bonkers. clay has his big annual proficiency check the next two days. he was studying and i was trying to keep the kids calm. ha (i'll be writing a 'worse than a blizzard post' tomorrow, i think). after dinner they were beating each other up and i decided it was time to rotate to the playroom until bedtime. the lu put on her cinderella ball gown & gloves (for the gala, obviously), and twirled around. then she picked up a phone. and told me to call her prince. and i pretended to talk to him (asked him his name, how old he was, and would he wait 20 or so years please before taking my daughter) and this suddenly weepy mama was at it again. watching my pea twirl around, thinking about her really meeting her prince someday. and suddenly i'm sobbing & lu is looking at me wondering what alien has taken her mama away and yet i just keep sobbing. 'why are you talking that way mama?' ugh, just cause i love you so, so very much my lu.

so consider yourself on notice family & friends...my moods are a-swinging!

so i didn't post last night.

instead, i stayed up until midnight finishing projects around the house i'd started and left 85% complete. i had attempted a very ambitious stencil project above the fireplace mantel...i'd finished the 'easy part' and it was quite sloppy looking & had been anything but easy. so last night i stayed up & just painted the whole thing one solid color. and i like it well enough. and i love that it is done.

so...i was exhausted today. and it was literally 107 degrees outside....i'm not even talking heat index (109, in case you are interested). so i did.not.step.a.single.foot.outside today. except to feed & water my super hot fat cat.

so anyway. i'll leave you with a few old photos i've just uploaded from my phone. cuz i decided to do that today while lying on the playroom floor watching my kiddos play with every.single.toy.in.the.room.

this one is actually from a few days ago. luci's friend allie eats whole apples (per the lu), so lu is on a whole apple kick. and you can guess who else wanted 'myyyne ayy-pple' then.

me & the lu...this one must be pretty old i think...it looks like a winter top.

and my face has that 'i've been running' look...not that 'i'm pregnant' look.

finding out there was to be another :)

i'm 28 weeks almost, so this would be from about 26 weeks ago.

the lil lu details

see, part of the problem is that i'm using my old work computer now, as our old personal laptop is a quickly sinking ship. and this laptop doesn't have a photo card thingy. so i have to use clay's new desktop to do photos. which, as we all have gathered, doesn't happen all that often.

so i'm making a pledge to post everyday, even if it is just a short blurb. cause i'll forget all the funny lil details of life that i absolutely LOVE going back & reading from prior years if i don't get them down.

so without further ado...i present the lil lu details...

-background: lu was curious about the little lever on the sink faucet that makes the drain plug, so i had explained how one could use that to 'make the sink a bowl'. she also was curious about the two handles for the faucet (one has a red circle for hot on it, the other blue for cold), as our old house had the one handle that you just pulled straight up. funny lu details: i find her last week drinking water out of the sink she had 'made into a bowl' with a straw. when i asked her what she was doing she excitedly told me that she was 'mixing colors! red & blue make warm!'

-she's been wearing regular panties to bed now for almost two weeks with ZERO accidents.

-she's started hitting herself in the head or pulling her hair when she is frustrated :( we encourage hugging of stuffed animals instead (per the pedi) but she seems to prefer inflicting physical pain on herself.

-she picks out every piece of her outfit, every day. rarely do they match. but that is okay.

-for the first time since she could barely walk she's not taking gymnastics. just dance this year. and she seems just fine with it. she 'practices' dance for at least an hour a day.

-she loves her some friends, but things can go downhill quickly. the 4 year old set has an amazing level of drama. her besties are allie, clara, keeley, & margeaux.

-she's super into my little pony right now. we have to play my little pony every.day.

-she loves her lil brother, but she loves him most when he does exactly what she wants him to do. which is happening less & less these days...

-she sleeps from 8pish to 6:30aish on average i'd say. many days it feels like less, and very few days it feels like more.

-she's finally into bows, braids & headbands. that she picks out, of course.

-she wears shoes & socks all day long. inside & outside.

-she prefers long pants to capris, shorts or dresses, although some days (not many) she surprises me.

-she's still a great eater. she loves her some broccoli & cheese, carrots with sauce (ranch dressing), peas, corn, pretty much all meats & cheeses, pastas, etc, but her favorite meal by far is a peanut butter & jelly sandwich.

-her favorite snacks are the salty ones...she LOVES super salty popcorn. she also loves yogurt smoothie drinks.

-she is getting really good at coloring...no 'scribble scrabble' (that is what her new teachers must call it?) for our girl anymore. just 'small strokes' she says.

-i'm reading the love languages for kids book...and i'm pretty sure her primary language is quality time. if i'm with her but not fully engaged you can be sure a melt down is soon to follow. so i've been working hard on incorporating her into helping me with my daily tasks so she feels engaged even when i'm just getting housework done. it usually takes a little longer, but the reward (a happy, confident pea) far outweighs the extra time it takes.

-she's started reading me stories at night. she thumbs through her little princess memo pads that she's scribbled in & makes up a (usually nonsensical) story. i kind of love it.

-she's SUPER excited for sweet baby to join us in november. every few days she asks if it is getting closer to thanksgiving :)

i'm sure there are tons more, but in the spirit of moving forward i'm going to publish & add things as i remember them.

first days of school...pre-k 4 & toddlers day out!

my peas started school this week...meet the teacher last week went well so i wasn't too worried about how the first days would go. and they were great.

lu started on monday and jumped right into her big kid 4 year old a beka curriculum...it is quite a bit more structured & academic than last year, but she thrives on structure so i think it'll be a good fit for her. she attends everyday but wednesday from 8:30a-12:00p, and eats lunch at home (woohoo for not having to pack lunch everyday!) . she's enjoyed it all week, but today she wasn't that into going before we left...although no tears were shed. she earned three 'happy sticks' and got to pick out something from the 'treasure chest' (3 sticks for good behavior in 3 days of attendance is pretty good i think!!) so that was the highlight of today.

he wasn't into a first day of school photo...

gus is in the toddlers day out program for kiddos 18mo-2years old on tuesday & thursday from 8:30a-12p. he's the third oldest in the class of seven kids, which will eventually grow to nine. one of his teachers is ms. j - lu's teacher from last year. he's in lu's old classroom so i think that helps...he recognizes the fish, the sink, etc. he did great on tuesday...he was SO excited to wash his hands in the big kid sink that he barely had time to tell me good-bye! today was a little different though as he knew what was coming...as soon as we got to the door of his room he started crying...and forget about that sink today. ms. j assured me he was soon fine & had a great day in spite of the rough start. she said he only cries at drop off, and then at pick up when the first parent shows up. he eats lunch at school, which is a good thing since he's usually totally sacked out by the time we get home. yes, he's one of those kids i thought i'd never have who falls asleep in the car & stays asleep while you put him in his bed. it's nice :)

interestingly enough, both of my very early rising children slept in until 8a (at which point i woke them up) on their respective first days. it never fails that the only time they sleep in is when i'm counting on them to be up!

and so you'd think i'd have all of this free time now, but on monday gusgus was super needy & a bit lost without his big sis around. on tues & thurs when i have the time all to myself i seem to keep uber busy with OB appointments, dentist visits, grocery shopping, and general errand running. although today i did have brunch with a girlfriend & that was super nice :) i'll have more of that, please!

it's not writers block...

it's just that time is flyin by my friends. the hours are limited and the tasks are endless. all wonderful tasks...tasks of a full family life coupled with having just moved into a new home. but i have to spend my energy wisely, and lately it's been spent on trying to make this new house our home while still giving my 3 peas & often traveling husband what they need. it's a tall order most days, but my chin is up and i'm marching on. happily, most days.

we took a long overdue trip to indiana to see the pierse family (g's first time!). it was lovely. grandma pierse made luci a homemade winnie the pooh cake & then the next day she got to have an ice cream cake! we had a great time and wish it wasn't such an ordeal to travel the distance. it'd be so nice to do it more frequently.

we got home on a wednesday at 2p and closed on our old house at 4p that day. so we are again the proud owners of just one home. it feels good. and our old house is in good newlywed hands...just the kind of people who are going to love it & keep it a home...not just a house.

the next morning (thursday) clay left to do a stint with the navy for 8 days. on friday my oldest dearest friend jenny came to visit. she worked hard (did my laundry, painted my dining room, took my kids to ikea with me...) and we SO enjoyed her company. luci told her she loved her & gus was looking for 'enny, enny' for days after she left. i love ya girl. thanks so much for coming.

then i was on my own from sunday afternoon until thursday afternoon (it was a long 4 days) when grandma & grandpa pierse arrived for their first visit to the new pad. clay got home late thursday night and much to his chagrin i put him to work right away...picking up furniture i found on woodlandsonline. it was no fun to dive right back into house projects, but with my growing belly there are just fewer & fewer things that i can do on my own. a HUGE thank you to clay & grandpa pierse who moved & assembled furniture MANY times. and to grandma pierse (& grandpa) who watched the kiddos for HOURS over multiple days while i repainted the kids' bathroom...it was a serious sunshine yellow that i just couldn't stomach. i'm much more of a neutral paint kinda girl. that said i TOTALLY underestimated how hard the painting of large-ish bathroom with 4 doors, a window, a shower & a mirror would be. um, yeah. it took FOREVER. but the 'atmospheric blue' color that it is now fills me with fresh peace, so i think it's worth it in the long run.

and so here we are. today was the last day of summer school for the kiddos. BONKERS. next week is a 'home week' with no activities except for a playdate at our house with some friends. we haven't had many people over since we moved so it'll be the first for most of them. fun times. we have a few doctor appointments (fun glucose test for me & my sweet boy) & a meet the teachers (for the regular school year) on friday but other than that we'll just do whatever we feel like. it'll be nice, i'm sure, and then nice to get back into a more structured rhythm once school starts. can't help it, i'm type a. i like a rhythm.

yet i know not to get too comfortable in said rhythm...see that 101 days over there? um, yeah. 'nuf said.

WHAT?!?!? 114 DAYS?

this pregnancy is FLYING by. 114 days? holy moly.

we're back from a trip to indiana to visit grandma & grandpa pierse. the kids travelled as well as we could have hoped, but i'm glad to be home.

my dearest, oldest bff jen is on an airplane right now so she can come hang for the weekend. SO EXCITED.

so, more to come next week!

life is full

seriously clay, can you believe we've been parents for almost 4 years?!?!

high five, my love :) i think that deserves a date night. go us. birthday loot from the rosonke side...
crafting in the new craft (yet currently still chaos) room.

and what post would be complete without a few of the many faces of my boy.
bashful...
i'm blessed.
life is full of lots of wonderful things that are proving to be all consuming.
namely my family & my new home.

seriously, could a girl ask for any more? not this one.

i need to blog about the lu's various birthday parties (officially 4 this coming Monday) and g's month notes for the last, um, too many to count months. i have photos :) thinking i'll post all at once come 19 months next week. geez, a 4 year old & a 19 month old. and an unborn 23-weeker.
i might get down in the daily tears & never ending tasks from time to time...
but i'm a grateful girl i tell ya.

spent.

i'm so spent i couldn't really even think of a title. i was thinking, 'i can't even think of a good title. i'm just spent'. so there you have it. i'm officially spent.


the house staging, packing & unpacking while continuing to mother my unborn, my toddler, & my drama filled incredibly emotional & suddenly insecure nearly four year old, not to mention an attempt at wife-ing (i'm fully aware that isn't the right word. or really even a word at all, but again, i'm spent) has taken its toll. i have nothing emotionally to give anyone except the occasional tears (to which luci asks me why i'm talking like a baby...i think because we tell her only babies cry, big girls use words?) and physically i'm beyond drained. i'm not sleeping well (that nausea/heartburn combo) and i know that is only making everything seem harder than it is.


in other news, yesterday was my last day as a gainfully employed professional. almost 12 years exactly. i started on july 7, 1999 at arthur andersen in chicago, and finished on july 15, 2011 at fifth third bank (in chicago...appropriately enough). i'm more emotional about this than i thought i'd be, and i'm having a hard time articulating those emotions. i'd like to. but again, i'm just too spent for the kind of cathartic thought and writing this seemingly momentous event requires & deserves.

the lu had one of her 4th birthday party celebrations today...the one with her friends as 'the craft place'. it went well for the most part, but it was a long day. more to come on that later. not sure why i'm so surprised at her fragile emotional state given my own. i'm certain they are connected.

i left my wallet at the grocery store after paying for her cake this morning. and didn't realize it until 5:30p. i'm grateful for the person who turned it in, untouched.

yep. that's about all i have in me at the moment.

i'm grateful for so many things. and i haven't forgotten how blessed i am. i swear. i'm just spent.

perks...

i'm not going to lie & say the move has been easy...quite the contrary...but we are exploiting the perks for all they are worth...

the first being that we spend a.LOT of time in our new (much larger) backyard. i love the paver stones that keep the bugs down & the new comfy chairs to sit in. the kiddos love the space, the play structure, the plastic pool the previous owners left, and the kai lan sprinkler. i do my best to keep them inside until 4ish (when the shade takes over), then we head out until dinner. sometimes we play after dinner too, like we did this day. in our clothes. they thought it was super cool. sometimes they are so easily pleased... i love it. next time nothing pleases them (which i'm sure will be soon) i'm going to remember this...

we paint with wet chalk...in our big girl panties.

g practices opening & closing the screen door...

while lu dumps buckets of water on our potted plants.

the new 'play constructor' as the lu calls it.

i think she's confused about us calling it a 'play structure'.

our pool & waterslide...

g spends a.LOT of time getting in & out of this car.

as my ever-wise mama friend amanda said, there are a lot of start up costs

(actually she probably didn't say costs...but the economics major in me turned it into a cost/benefit, ROI type of analysis...cuz that's how my brain works)

but the long term quality of life benefits life far outweigh this initial investment. it is a TON of work right now for clay & me getting everything settled, furnished & paid for.

but in the long run i know we are making a good investment.

i just might need to write that on my hand so i don't forget in the meantime.

grammy

joined us for nearly two weeks over the move. bless.her.heart. she came down on her 54th birthday...but i couldn't find the #4 candle to save my life, so we improvised.

we made her cake the day before :)
somebunny likes cake...

yum, yum!

seriously, i can't thank you enough mom.
thanks for always being there when i need you.

speaking of needing you...
can't wait to have you back in november (or before if you are up for it ;)!

well, we survived

the move. thanks mostly to grammy (my mom), and 3 very strong able bodied 20 something moving men.

the movers estimated it would take about 5-7 hours to move us, and it ended up taking a full 10. how/why do we have this much stuff and where in the world did it come from?!?! and i thought moving as newlyweds was hard...sheesh...it's got nothin on moving a family of 4 still saving baby things until we become a family of 5! and it was only 3 miles away! and we made several car trips in addition to our big giant box truck that made two trips. it feels like we've already filled up the extra nearly 1000 square feet & the garage...ugh.

gus had a very rough night the first night we moved in. he took about a 30 minute nap in the morning in his stroller, and that was it. by 5:45p he was totally out..but he was filthy from being outside all day so i had to dunk him in the bathtub...you can imagine how well that went. poor thing. he slept great...till 1:30a...then he was awake until 4AM!! even with benadryl! just looking around his room, talking (eyes, eyes, ear, belly belly belly) kickin his legs...ugh. the lu stayed down once she was in bed, but she didn't settle down in her room until well past 9p. since then it's gotten better each night, so knock on wood maybe we'll all sleep through the night tonight (ha!).

tallulah (our outside-only cat) seems to be fine...she loves the new big backyard. milo takes off pretty much all day & night, coming back just once or twice a day to make sure we are still here & to eat. interestingly enough he doesn't want anything to do with being inside, even though he used to spend pretty much all day everyday on our bed or luci's bed. i don't really care as long as he stays around & still wants to be our cat...inside, outside or a combo, he can pick.

my mom arrived last sunday (6.26...her birthday! happy birthday!) and has seriously made the entire thing possible. she packed a TON of things for us & happily watches the kiddos whenever we ask...and many times even when we don't. she's kept us sane & on good behavior. she & gus are thick as thieves...it is pretty funny to watch them interact. the lu is having a pretty rough time with the move & is a whiny mess most of the time...but i know she's still enjoying her grammy time because she kept asking why grammy didn't come to the parade with us today (because it's 100 degrees here all the time).

we've still got a TON of unpacking & getting settled to do, but i've got the kitchen & the coat closet (shoes, backpacks, lunchboxes, etc), and living room functional so we can have some sense of normalcy. i'm trying hard to contain the chaos to just a few rooms (my craft room...yes, i have my own craft room/office-woohoo, and what will be the baby's room) while we live & get settled on the side. i'm finding the 'settling' much more difficult with two kids who crave/need attention & a sense of normalcy. and for that reason priority #1 is now their rooms and their toy room. lu's room just needs a bit more unpacking & finishing touches, but g's room is still half pink, half brown and is in desperate need of finishing touches. and the playroom needs some new shelves, and is still totally packed up. so yeah, i got lots to do.

on that overwhelming note, i'm going to watch some evening news & get some sleep!

ps...did i mention that before we even moved in the lu threw up spaghetti in 3 rooms and i spilled a gallon of quiver tan paint on g's bedroom floor? all on our freshly cleaned CARPET? um, yeah. thanks to this man, all is still well. he returned my panicked emergency call and came over within a few hours to save the day. can't recommend him enough!

pps...happy 4th of july. a grateful thanks to all of our brave men & women (and their families) in the armed forces!

home

as of this week, is starting to look like this.

on saturday, july 2nd, all of our belongings will find their way over & make it official.

since april 28, 2006, home has looked like this.

i love this house. our home. five years later we've picked out every doorknob, light fixture, and cabinet pull. i love this house so much so, in fact, that when i unexpectedly met a potential buyer (who turned out to be offer #3, executed contract #2) i started to cry telling her how much i loved it here. good thing i could blame it on being pregnant. but the dear sweet woman gave me a hug & started to get teary too.

they feel like the right people to me. i hope they are. if we do make it to closing i'll feel good about our house having a lovely new family. and i'll have done well by my cottage green peeps, who from the beginning helped make this house our home.

getting weepy again. time for bed i think.

18 weeks

18 weeks...here i am.
hardest pregnancy to do date...still nauseous on any given day, with heartburn on the off days. my energy level is usually pretty good though, gotta love the second trimester. the weeks & months are FLYING by! i went to my ob on thursday & our sweet second son is as healthy as we can know him to be at this point :) he's estimated to weigh about 8 ounces. he kicks me a lot. i'm not complaining.

hmm. other notes?
all i want to eat are cheeseburgers.
i have round ligament pain, like all.the.time.
i'm having a hard time sleeping.

i think that's it for now...off to bed.

father's day

my LOVES on fathers day...

we went to church, hung out, had to wake up gus to leave the house for a showing, hit the pool, the kiddos melted, we went to outback for dinner, and put the kiddos to bed!

my love, you are an amazing father and we are SO lucky to have you!

another brother on the way

it has been confirmed...another brother is on the way!!

according to our ultrasound tech our lil guy is quite cooperative & photogenic...and not at all modest or bashful...we got quite a few shots of his boy parts!!

we saw the four chambers of the heart & his little spine :)

luci is excited to have another little brother...she seems to have already forgotten that she wanted a sister.

now we just have to figure out a name for the handsome lil man!

steel trap

last night the lu wanted to bring her strawberry shortcake doll into the bath with her. sure, yeah, whatever i say. but strawberry's dress gets wet when gus grabs her before we were able to disrobe her, and the lu is VERY distraught that strawberry won't have any pjs to wear. then she says, 'ah ha!' and tells me that she'll just put strawberry's other outfit on her.

now can't remember when for sure strawberry came to live with us, but it has been quite awhile, and i've only ever seen her in one outfit...the very same one that was wet. so i ask lu about the outfit, and she tells me it's a small one. i still have ZERO idea what she is talking about. i ask her where it is, she says she's not sure, but she thinks its downstairs in 'the white thing'. um, okay, i say. i tell her she can go find the outfit while i put gus down for the night.

when i finish with gus the lu is still downstairs & just super duper distraught. i still think this supposed other outfit doesn't exist. i tell her so with a gentle, but firm 'it's time for bed so please stop stalling' kind of voice. she responds with a VERY genuine 'but mama, the easter bunny brought it for me.' oh, that's right i think...the easter bunny did bring strawberry. and i didn't remember that part, so maybe there is another outfit? i talk her into coming upstairs, and then she decides to check in her bench for the outfit.

and sure enough...what does she pull out? an old white baby wipe container, that now holds 2 rapunzel skirts and...you guessed it...strawberry's other outfit. a short lil dress. the girl's memory is like a steel trap.

just cuz

a few shots of pure joy...

but mostly shots capturing our everyday crazy...

my poor blog is suffering these days. just back from vacation, 1 month of work left to document the last 6 years of my career for my poor boss, 17 weeks pregnant, two kiddos under four to entertain in 100+ degree weather (we swim. A.LOT.), regularly showing a house, thinking and stressing but not yet doing anything about moving in two weeks...aside from calls moving utilities, cable...which, btw...it took me an hour just to do cable yesterday...leaves me without much energy left to post on my blog at night. which is sad, because in a few years when my memory inevitably fades i'll wonder about how we made it through this time.

oh, and the new house is officially ours. closing was on june 6th. went very smoothly, really. did i already post about that? what was that i said about my memory fading in a few years? guess i don't need to worry about that...it's too late! i'm already there!