time

is something I don't have much of lately. I'm giving myself 10 minutes to post...so if it isn't very eloquent please forgive! something that has been reaffirmed over & over again in the last five weeks is that the board room phase of my life was certainly much easier. so as a throw back...here goes an executive dashboard view of my life...everything you need to know in one place, readable in 10 minutes.

-my days are longer/more difficult than my nights now. i NEVER dreamed that would be the case. yes, the nights are sleepless, but the days, oh the days. two kids crying. feeling like neither one is getting 100% of what they need, wondering if i'm giving the right one the right attention at the moment...ugh.

-my house is even more of a disaster than usual.

-gus is now on prevacid...i hope it works. he loves the way it tastes (strawberry).

-luci is sick...fever of 100.4, CONSTANTLY runny nose, watery eyes...she's not seriously ill, but just a bad cold need a lot of snuggle time kind of sick. there is seriously snot EVERYWHERE.

-desired snuggle time is rough when there is a 5 week old who also needs attention, and to be kept away from his sick sister best as possible. dr. brooke says we don't want to walk the sick newborn path. this is impossible to explain to the sick 2 1/2 year old.

-trying to balance needs tonight, my baby largely cried himself to sleep at 5 weeks old. not more than 5 minutes at a time, but more than i wanted him to. i wanted to just rock him in the dark until he fell into sweet slumber. but his 2 1/2 year old sister needed some snuggle time & a nice book read. and she got it.

-we are interviewing care providers starting this weekend. finding potential providers has taken a lot of time. i'm looking for someone just for about 10 hours a week while i work. i was supposed to start back up on Monday (yeah right), but my awesome boss is giving me a few more weeks. i'm terrified that no matter how wonderful said care provider seems to be that my baby is going to be shaken. (he cries. a lot.) thinking about this keeps me awake at night. and not when i'm already awake tending to a child. the kind of extra painful awake you have when you know you need to be sleeping.

-my friend Amanda came over last night to help me out during bedtime and give me the adult interaction i am so missing. i love her for this, and for many other things.

-my friend Sara took AMAZING newborn photos of Gus. they are so amazing I don't want to share them until i pick one for his birth announcement. and all i need to get that done is a bit more TIME. until then, here is a sneak peak.


my 10 minutes are up. off to bed in hopes of some sweet slumber of my own.