He is Good

reading books.... cheeeeeeeese!

Here she is actually hanging upside down courtesty of Aunt Baylee!

The girl LOVES her some shooooooes.

Look at what He's given me so far! How can I not trust in that? I'm doing EVERYTHING I can to fill this body with peace. I'm fighting anxiety with my new mantra..."Lord, please give us what we need." And it seems to be working. I'm sleeping again and the pit of anxiety that has consumed me for the last 4 weeks has dissipated. When I feel it coming on I repeat "Lord, please give us what we need" over & over until I'm calm again. My type A personality may be a gift professionally, but boy does it require a lot of energy to subdue & maintain as a mama.

For those of you not 'in the know' on conception & OB lingo these days, peas 3 & 4 are two weeks smaller than they should be...that is not good. At such an early stage of the pregnancy, they should be measuring very close to right on, provided my dates are right. And as I said before in the last post, I know that they are. The growth hormone in my blood was high for no babies, but seemingly low for a baby at 8 weeks, and seemingly super low for two babies at 8 weeks. I feel fewer pregnancy symptoms everyday. I still have a belly bulge that is quite large, but that is about it. (I had hoped there was a wonderful reason that my pants no longer fit at 5.5 weeks! Now I know!)

On the positive side, my most favorite nurse called Friday morning to confirm everything the tech had told me on Thursday. She said the tech found 2 heartbeats...that is very good. I still have not spotted...that is very good. Clay & I will go back to our OB on Thursday morning for another look at our sweetpeas. I'm debating asking for another HCG (growth hormone) check on Monday, but I'm doing my best to just repeat, "Lord, please give us what we need." I know that all of the information I can gather will ultimately not change His plan for us. I am trying to be patient. I also know that the body & stats can fool us...if I've learned anything about motherhood through my own experience and the experiences of my friends, it is that often things are not what they seem. Thank you to everyone for your kind words & thoughts. All we can do is trust & have faith that He is Good, and He will give us what we need.